• My Beginning!

    How amazing You are to me, O Lord!  Today is a new day for me, and a new year!  Today is the day that You saved me from death, and granted me clemency from a death sentence that I had hanging over my head, for all of the sins that I had committed in my entire life!  This is a day of great rejoicing for me!  This is the day that I was baptized, and it was 14 years ago, to this very day, that You saved me and delivered me!  Thank You, O Lord for Your Great Mercy!  You did not have to do it, but You did!

    You sent me the Man of God, Xmeah, to speak to me and to prepare me for that which I did not even know that I was headed to!  As I was talking to the family yesterday about this, You caused me to remember that I was actually guided every step of the way, leading up to my baptism!  Amen!

    The baptism is unto You, and not unto man or a denomination!  Amen!

    How blessed You are, and what a way to start off the day!  We were at the park, and I was sitting at a table writing, and the kids and my husband were playing basketball.  I was writing about how this is about to be my fourteenth birthday, and I was watching as the sun was getting ready to set.  I knew that at sunset it is actually the start of a new day, and that is when my 14th year starts!  The radio was on, and when the sun went below the tree line, the same song that I heard on the day that I was born, played on the radio!  I shouted, “What a way to start of the day!”  The song was saying, “Don’t turn around!”  It was the exact song that I heard just after I was baptized!

    My Lord, You amaze me and You excite me, like no one can!  Amen!  You are my Joy, my Strength, my Deliver, my Comforter, You are Everything to me!  Amen!

    What an amazing journey it has been!  I began to speak about the events that took place that day, and all the things the Lord has done for me since then, and it is so amazing what You have done, O Lord!  It is so true that we do not know where it is that You are leading us, but we follow You blindly, and You do guide us by the words of the Mouth of the Man of God, and You do lead us into the Paths of Righteousness!  You lead us in the Perfect and the Best Way!  All we have to do is obey and follow the steps You give, and everything works out for our benefit!  Amen!

    I remember what kind of whorish person I used to be!  I remember all the lying, deceiving and manipulating I used to do!  I remember all the evil ways, evil thoughts, the evil deeds, and how I was so sneaky, that I would not get caught for the things I did, and I would watch as others took the blame for what I did!  I do not think I can describe what a wicked person I was!  How I caused men to lust after me, and played with people’s emotions, and had a sharp tongue that loved to hurt people every chance I had!  I was a robber and a thief, and would steal from the people who were kind to me and tried to help me!  I was a wretched and selfish person back then, that did not care about anyone but myself! I was full of hate and anger and I was a horrible person!  I plotted and schemed people, and I was the best liar of them all!  My Lord, but You took all that away from me!

    It was days before my baptism, that I was talking on the phone to the Messenger of the Lord, Xmeah ShaEla’ReEl, and I was telling him about a conversation that I had with my husband where I was boasting and saying, “It’s a shame I can lie so good!”  I was talking about a situation where I had talked to my husband’s boss at Burger King, and I was lying to him, telling him that my husband could not go to work that day, because he had gotten arrested and was in jail!  I was lying to the man, but I said it in such a way that the man felt real sorry for me and for the kids, and he told me that I can come to my husband’s job and pick up his check, and he would cash it for me, so that the kids and I could have some money for us to live on!  I know that this is something that he was not supposed to do, but he had compassion on me, and the children and was going to do this, to help us out!

    I boasted about how well I could lie and make people do what I wanted!@ I remember that day that I boasted about that! I jumped on the bed and said, “It’s a shame I can lie so good!”

    I was so proud of my evil ways!

    I was speaking to Xmeah, on the phone about this, and the Lord spoke to me, through him, and told me, “You have a need to be baptized!”

    And that is how it all started!  The Lord continued to speak to me, through Xmeah and he told me that I had to go back and ask people that I had sinned against, to forgive me for what I had done to them! He told me that the Lord would show me who to go to.  And so when we got off the phone, the Lord did just as He said He would do, through Xmeah’s mouth!  He began to put certain people in my mind, and with that, I sought these people out to go and to go confess what I had done to them and ask them to forgive me.

    After having lived 23 years in sin, and being proud of my whorish and sneaky ways, it was very hard for me to now come clean to people and tell them that I was not what they thought I was, and what I had been doing to them all along.  But I went forth, even though I was afraid to do what I was told to do!

    Thank You, O Lord for the steps of obedience that You have given me to do, through the mouth of the Man of God!

    An amazing thing had happened, because one of the people that came to my mind was the mother of a childhood friend that I had, and her mother treated me as one of her daughters.  I had spent years lying and deceiving her and robbing her blind, and she never knew it was me doing it!  She always blamed her younger daughter, or my friend for it, and I would watch as she would whip them for the things that I had done.  I would see this and just sit back and laugh inside, with no remorse about someone else getting a punishment for what I had done!

    But now they had moved to a new house, and I had only been to that house once before, and I did not remember where she lived.  But I got in my car and started driving, to find her, and the Lord led me straight to her new house!  When I got there, she was not home, so I waited for her.

    I was very nervous as I sat on the couch, not telling anyone why I was there.  I cannot remember a time before that day that I was ever so scared, but I knew I had to do this!

    She came home, and I asked her if I could talk to her privately, so I left the kids on the couch and we went into her room so we could talk.

    I was so nervous, I was shaking and I could hardly breathe!

    I began to confess to her all that I had ever done to her and I told her that I was very sorry, and asked her to forgive me!  I thought she was going to slap me for lying to her for so long and for making her think that I was something that I was not! She even used to tell her own daughters that she wished they were more like me, but yet, I was the one that was doing all this evil right before her eyes, and she never knew it!

    But to my surprise, she reached out and hugged me!  She told me that she had never been more proud of me, than she was at that moment, and when she said that I burst out into tears crying!  I did not feel worthy to be looked upon so highly and to be forgiven, but she did!

    I was taking my first steps of faith to do what the Lord was telling me to do, and little did I know, at that time, where all of this was leading me to!  This was my beginning!

    I continued to go to people, as the Lord brought people and instances to my remembrance, and ask them to forgive me for what I had done.  And each time, it was to my surprise that the person did not get angry with me, but they forgave me and even commended me!  This was shocking to me!  Amen!

    I was also told, by Xmeah, that the Church of Christ will baptize anyone, at anytime.  So I looked in the Yellow Pages, under Church of Christ and found a certain number, and called!  The preacher was there and I told him that I wanted to be baptized.

    He told me to come over.  So I did.

    When I got there, there was a funeral going on, where one of the members had died, and the people were getting together to eat.  We walked down a dark hallway to his office, and then we sat down and talked.

    He asked me why did I want to be baptized and I told him of all things that I had done.

    I remember looking around his office and on his desk I saw the name plate that said “Governor Clemons.”  I remember seeing it, and thinking that it was a weird name, but did not pay it too much attention, to it, at the time.  It was not until later that all of the events that took place, would come back to my remembrance and be explained to me, by the Lord, through Xmeah’s mouth!

    Then we left and he took me to the place where they baptize people.  He told me that he was sorry, but the baptismal pool was not heated, and I told him it did not matter to me, because I needed to do this, and it would be better to be cold than to suffer in hell for my sins!

    So he called two women and they came with us.  One woman took the children, and Michael, who was just a little baby, at the time, and the other woman took me upstairs to a room to get undressed.  She gave me a white robe to put on, and then led me outside.  I walked into a large room, where I saw the pool, and the preacher was in the water, with his arms stretched out to me.  He told me to come to him, and I looked and saw that the kids were below me,  with the woman, and then two white children had walked in the back and they stood there watching.

    I went into the water and then the man started to speak to me and ask me questions, if I believed that Jesus Christ is the Son of God and that He died for my sins and was raised again.  I said that I did.  And then he took me and put me under the water!  It was an amazing feeling, because I remember being under the water, and I remember that I felt so heavy!  In water, I know a person normally feels lighter, but I felt extremely heavy underwater, and then as he was lifting me up, it was as if something heavy was being pulled off of me and I was being separated from something as I was coming up out of the water!  It was as if I could physically feel this weight being lifted off of me and being pulled away from me!  It was miraculous!  I came up out of the water and I was so happy!  I was very excited, and I went and got dressed and left!

    When I got in my car and we were headed home, there was a certain part of a song that was just playing over and over in my head!  It would not leave!  I even shook my head one time, as if trying to get the song out of my mind, saying, to myself; “This is not a Christian song!  So why am I thinking about it!”

    But what did I know of Christianity, only being baptized into the Kingdom, a few minutes ago!

    I went to a congregation that I was going to at the time, called New Creation, and I went in and told the wife of a deacon, who was a secretary what had happened to me!  I was so excited, but she got mad and asked why didn’t I wait, so that the pastor could baptize me on Sunday!

    It was a Tuesday, that I was baptized and I told her that if I had died that night, waiting for Sunday to come along, I would be in Hell!

    She still did not rejoice with me, so I left!  As I was walking out, the Pastor was there coming out of his office and I shouted to him, down the hallway, and told him what had happened and he just gave  me a faint smile, and a nod and walked away.  He did not care either!

    I left and I told one of my friend’s who said that she was a Christian, and she did not rejoice with me either on what had happened!

    No one, I told, was happy about what a wonderful thing had happened to me!

    It was not until the next day that I called Xmeah and Cherry on the phone and told them what had happened to me!  And only then, when I told them, did someone shout for joy!  He was so happy and they rejoiced with me!

    I began to tell him what all had happened and also the song that was in my head, and how I told him that it was not a Christian song that was in my mind, and he asked me; “What did the song say?”

    I said, “It said, ‘Don’t turn around!”

    He then said, “That is what the Lord is telling you!  Don’t turn around!”

    Amen!  And it has been 14 years, and I have not turned around, and I have  headed on towards following the Lord!

    Blessed are You, O Lord and for the deliverance You gave me!

    Even how You explained to me, through Xmeah, that the Governor is the one who gives Clemency to death row inmates.  And that is what God had done for me!  He granted me life, from a death sentence I had over my head!

     Blessed are You, O Lord Who has done this great thing for me, and blessed is this Holy Day that You have blessed me to see!  Thank You Lord for Xmeah, who You have given to us, to guide us every step of the way!  The journey has been great, and I know even greater things are to come!


    These were some things that I was reading that I wrote in Previous Reports, from my 13th Year:

    Last night I was given a dream that showed that I was 3 months pregnant. And that was the reason I had been very tired lately and also hungry, more than usual. What does this mean, my Lord?  When a woman is pregnant and she is eating, she is also feeding the baby that is inside her.  What she eats the baby eats!  Just as when we receive the Word of God for ourselves, we also give it to others.  We give them the same thing we have received.  Also, the baby inside of her, does do a lot to the pregnant woman, but the woman never hates the baby in her.  Because of the baby inside, the woman does get tired, and also has to go through tremendous labor pains to deliver this baby, but once it is born, there is great rejoicing and the pains and sufferings, that she had to go through, are not remembered anymore!  Amen!

  • “Biting Off More Than You Can Chew: Or, Taking On More Than You Can Handle!”

    The Lord God adds to the Church such as should be saved!  People come to learn, and not to be contentious!  The Spirit of the Assembly must not be vexed!  God adds to us as He knows we are able to handle it.  Temperance must be in place at all times!  Love must be there whereby you are not easily provoked!  You might be like Danny Glover: Too Old For This Shit!”  That only means you are not ready to deal with what has come upon you!  But, if a thing has been thrust upon you; you can ask God for what you need to be able to deal with it!  Emergencies do pop up!  But, does not God know all that will take place?